What is your definition of being shy?

[English Kate]

It's a bit like an outer body experience isn't it. You know you are splurging complete rubbish out of your mouth when you speak, but there is nothing you can do to control it and yes I still blush too. Sometimes I feel like a bit of a fraud when that happens, as though I'm trying to give a wrong impression about who I am, as Kate would never do that, but that is the me that wants to be loved I guess.

[abcdef]

i think im too honest when i meet someone prefer they know all my flaws

[English Kate]

Perhaps you are selective in your honesty as well lolo, as you seem to focus on the negative and not be so forth coming with the positive. Through private conversation with you I have come across some qualities that I admire very much. I admit that it makes me feel special that we have discussed things that are private to you, but those conversations expose the beautiful person you are inside and it is a shame that others may not see that.

[abcdef]

now u have made me blush kate i have loved our private conversations thank god i never bored u to death, u already know how much i admire u as well & how special u are too me

that is true there isnt very many people who have saw that side of me, i keep getting told that on bookings as well to expose it more, i cant answer why i dont

[English Kate]

Perhaps self preservation? modesty? Either way it is a shame, but we are complex creatures and none of us perfect.

You can tell I've had an energy drink being up at this time in the morning still. Just started to feel tired now and I had the drink hours ago!!!

Oh I saw some orange lucozade selling at half price yesterday in Sainsbury's, just in case you didn't know about it. You never bore me by the way xx

[SassyAnn]

God Kate, I hope I wasn't being coy. That makes me feel as though I was being artificial, which I wasn't.....but I was embarrassed. I think I do either spout nonsense or go into a rehearsed patter, otherwise I'll forget what to say. If I'm relaxed though, I can just concentrate on the voice and try and make them feel good.
I come from a very loud, gregarious family but I think I lost my confidence later in life. Bravado and making jokes was a coping mechanism, and I can be spikey - not intentionally. But when I had the opportunity ie. when I moved to Newcastle and started working from home I became a recluse and didn't meet anyone new for 10 years, except a neighbour who is now in his 80s... who looked out for me.
Hicky, I think I was probably being brash and making jokes when I met you - I didn't feel at all relaxed. It wasn't your fault though, it was just me being self-conscious.
Lolo, I know how you feel about chatting with friends and family on the phone! Mine get so exasperated with me... but each time I do finally speak to them, I can't get them off the phone quick enough.
Years ago, working in the City, I used to have to walk from my office to my boss's office, and I couldn't cross the floor he worked on as there were 100s of people there. So I used to walk through the basement - I did that for about 2 years before I managed to convince myself that everyone was working and no-one looking at me!
Kate, to me you seem so grounded, warm and confident. I'm always in awe that you know the right thing to say to people.

[Hicky]

Okay granted the walking through the basement thing maybe a very powerful example of shyness. Yep I doubt many can top that one Ann.

But not being relaxed and acting a part is not an indication of shyness. All of us in our day to day lives tend to act differently with different people and in different scenario's. I must have at least 8/9 differnet workplace personna's i use every day alone. It does not mean that any of them are not a little bit of the real me (and probably a little bit of what I think i should professionally be in those particular circumstances). It does not mean that by acting a certain role at a certain time that i am being shy or bashful about my full rounded character. We can't all go around revealing all our characteristics to everyone and in all honesty we would not have time read everyone we meet to that extent if we all did.
But if you find yourself adopting characteristics like being brash and you are uncomfortable with it in yourself you should stop doing it. If you are comfortable acting a part however little you may feel it may have to do with the real you then have fun with it and play with it. I think this is what many women are saying on here re their professional lives - eg that as an escort they can comfortably act a role which they think is not really like their true selves. But so what? - we all do that - i believe olde Will Shakespeare said summat 'bout all the world being a stage etc etc. He knew a thing or two about human characteristics for a Brummie!

[SassyAnn]

So I'm not shy, I'm petrified!

My best friend could top the walking through the basement thing. Defo.
Can't reveal more - discretion and all that.

[Hicky]

What like a jelly?

Nah despite indications to the contrary you are just a normal (though special) human being!

[SassyAnn]

Ahhh, you and Freddo tarting around at this time of the morning! It's heartwarming.

Thank you Cpt James T Hicky, you're special too.